


The Hangover

by oswiniarty



Category: Hidden Block (Video Blogging RPF)
Genre: Excessive Drinking, Las Vegas, M/M, The Hangover AU, party in las vegas, yet another of emrys's "this is a bad week" feel good fics
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-11
Updated: 2016-12-12
Packaged: 2018-08-30 06:01:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,027
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8521216
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/oswiniarty/pseuds/oswiniarty
Summary: Luke, Ian, Caddy, and Jimmy celebrate Jimmy's 21st birthday in Vegas. (This is literally a stupid au loosely based on the Hangover movies.)





	1. The Setup

_“Do you, Ian, take James to be your lawfully wedded husband?”_

_“I do.”_

_“And do you, James, feel the same?”_

_“I do.”_

* * *

Ian wakes up to a splitting headache and a warm body on top of him. _Whose_ body it is is a mystery, though if he had a desire to open his eyes against the no doubt blinding sunlight he’d probably know.

Wiggling his limbs a bit lets him know that one of his hands is currently held by someone else’s, though his other arm is free, so he uses that to cover his eyes. His legs are covered up by what can only be assumed to be a sheet, but they’re hanging off the bed anyways, so they’re not as warm as he’d like them to be.

“I’m awake, but at what cost,” someone mumbles next to him, and he tenses when he realises who it is.

James.

He bends his arm so that he can blink one eye open, turning to look at the Brit. _What the fuck,_ Ian wonders to himself. _Why is he in the same room as me, much less the same bed._

* * *

**36 hours ago.**

“Ian, man, c’mon,” Luke pleads, tugging on Ian’s arm like a small child. “We gotta be there when Caddy’s plane lands.”

Ian groans like the adult he is. “I don’t wanna. You know James and I don’t get along, anyways.”

“No, I know that’s just a lie you tell your viewers so they’re more interested in both of you,” Luke says, and Ian knows he’s absolutely goddamn _right_ , but he doesn’t want to admit that.

Some part of him wishes that he actually _did_ hate James. He wishes that in some way he didn’t venerate the man, that he maybe wasn’t a little in love with him.

“Fiiiiine,” Ian sighs, finally pushing himself up from the couch in their hotel room, drawing out the i sound. “But I’m not gonna like it.”

Luke laughs at his friend’s pretend annoyance, guiding him through the hotel and back to their car.

The ride to the airport is a short one, but the walk to James’s gate is much longer, and way more confusing.

For one, the Las Vegas airport is busy, presumably all the time, and Luke and Ian end up staring at the arrivals board for at least an hour wondering if he’d be coming in from Toronto, Los Angeles, or London.

Eventually they decide that a nonstop flight would be cheapest, and that he’d be coming in from London. Ian checks his phone to see that they didn’t need to stare at the arrivals board at all, because James sent him the information they’d been looking for the whole time.

What an asshole.

They walk to his gate in companionable silence, though have to stop to ask for directions at least twice.

“Hey, isn’t Jimmy supposed to be flying in this weekend too?” Ian asks, as they’re waiting for James’s plane to land.

Luke looks up from his phone, eyes going wide as he remembers. “Shit, his plane is landing soon too.”

Ian raises his eyebrows at his friend. “How about you stay here to greet James, and I’ll go pick up Jimmy.”

He doesn’t mean it as a suggestion.

“Y’know that’s a great idea,” Luke starts, “but considering Jimmy’s my boyfriend…”

Ian groans, similar to the way he did in the hotel room, dragging out the i again as he speaks. “Fiiiiine. But you owe me.”

The rapper grins, tipping his hat before walking off to find Jimmy’s gate.

“Meet us at baggage claim when he lands!” Ian calls after him.

* * *

After that, time passes pretty slowly without someone to waste it with. He tries to play a game on his phone, but finds that his attention keeps straying to the fact that he’s about to be alone with James for an extended period of time.

Eventually, he settles against the wall, watching the planes come and go through the window, mind racing.

Not that they’re not _close_ , but Ian and James have never been alone anywhere for more than three minutes, because their friends usually feel the need to babysit them in case James tries to kill Ian, or vice-versa.

None of their arguments have ever escalated that far, though. Ian isn’t sure if that’s because he’s always carefully chosen his words, or if it’s because they’ve just naturally stayed that way. Probably the former.

There’s also the fact that Ian likes James probably too much. Definitely more than James likes him in return.

A British Airways plane touches down on the runway outside, coasting to a stop at the gate tunnel, and Ian straightens up automatically. He knows it’ll be another ten minutes until James gets through the door, but at least this way he’ll already be used to standing straight.

He smirks as he remembers that James is shorter than him, because Ian being taller than him is most definitely a tender spot.

The gate doors open after a couple minutes, and Ian keeps his eyes peeled for a short, angry Brit. Said man looks like his mood just worsens when he spots just Ian and none of his other friends.

“James,” Ian greets, smirk still playing on his face.

“Moosey,” James growls.

“How’s the weather down there?”

“Shut your goddamn stupid face.”

Ian chuckles, starting in the direction of baggage claim, assuming James is following behind him.

* * *

They meet Luke and Jimmy at baggage claim, wait for the two to get their bags, and then go back to the hotel.

The group sits around for a little bit before deciding “Hey, we’re in Vegas, let’s do something reckless.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok so im editing the times on this once again. it started with 72, then i thought that was too long, so i moved it down to 48 hours, which is still too long, so im gonna move it even more down to 36 hours & adjusting from there.


	2. The Bet

**32 hours ago.**

It starts with a bet, like most things do. James bet Jimmy that he can’t drink him under the table, even though it’s only Jimmy’s 21st birthday and he’d never drink this much ever in his life. Except they’re celebrating in Vegas, and for the plot to further they all need to be drunk as fuck.

James ends up losing the bet, because Jimmy drinks like a fucking champ, apparently, and by the end of it they’re both stumbling, Luke supporting his boyfriend and Ian begrudgingly supporting James.

* * *

**30 hours ago.**

Somewhere along the way James and Jimmy manage to sober up enough to walk properly, but then immediately get drunker, Ian and Luke following shortly behind.

Ian quickly loses sight of Jimmy and Luke, who presumably go off to make out in the hotel room. Which leaves him with an annoying, stupid, attractive, annoying Brit.

Wait, what was that third word? Angry? Probably. He’s too drunk to remember completely.

He’s also too drunk to stop himself from leaning into Caddy, hand supporting himself on the bar they’re sitting at. His head tilts to rest on the other’s shoulder.

“Y’know I don’t hate you, right, Jam- _hic_?” He was probably going to finish Caddy’s name, but he was rudely interrupted by his own body and now he’s too lazy to finish it.

Caddy stiffens next to him, but he doesn’t realize it.

* * *

**29 hours ago.**

Caddy buys two bottles of vodka, one for Ian, and one for himself, while Ian waits near the door to the fire escape. Their plan is to sneak up to the roof and do something, though _what_ they haven’t decided on yet.

The bartender hands Caddy his card back, and the Brit walks over to Ian, card held out to return it. When it’s put away, Ian takes Caddy’s hand and leads him up to the roof as quietly as two drunk people with two bottles of cheap vodka can manage.

They sit on the roof overlooking the city, silently sharing one of the bottles of vodka, deciding to save the other bottle for later.

Caddy breaks the silence first.

“I don’t hate you, either,” he admits, quietly. “Actually, I rather enjoy your company.”

Ian looks over to find that Caddy’s turned to him, and their eyes lock. He offers a small smile, and the Brit returns it nervously.

He hands the bottle over, and then shifts closer to Caddy, leaning into him. Ian opens his mouth, seeming to think for moment, before speaking. “I like your videos.”

The moment is broken with those words, and Caddy rolls his eyes at Ian. “Shut your stupid pretty face.”

The American laughs, smirking. “What was that?”

“What?”

“What’d you call me?”

“I called you stupid,” Caddy clarifies, frowning. “Because you’re stupid. And tall.”

“I think you called me pretty.”

“And _I_ think you’re full of shite,” Caddy tells him.

Well, he starts to tell him, but halfway through the sentence Ian is leaning in closer, that stupid smirk still playing on his face, and it’s honestly flustering the Brit.

He grows quiet, and Ian?

Ian kisses him.

* * *

**27 hours ago.**

Walking into the hotel room reveals Jimmy and Luke curled up together on the king-size bed, blankets barely messed up.

They startle when the door is slammed open, and Ian giggles behind Caddy. “Were we inter- _hic_ -interruptin’ anythin’?”

There’s a pair of shoes thrown haphazardly into the bathroom and two discarded shirts on the way to the bed, but when Caddy flicks on the lights, they find out that pants are still on.

Luke sits up, blinking blearily at him, one hand laced with Jimmy’s, who just stays down. His eyes flick between Ian and Caddy, at their own linked hands, and he raises his eyebrows in a question.

Which is quickly explained away when he sees the bottle of liquor.

“Where were you two?” Luke asks.

“Nowhere,” Caddy says, too quick.

* * *

**28 hours ago.**

Caddy knows he should pull away, that Ian _doesn’t actually like him_ , but he doesn’t.

The kiss is sloppy, because both parties are superbly drunk, but neither of them seem to really care.

Caddy thinks about how he should pull away, but then decides that no, he really doesn’t, so they keep kissing.

Until they need to come up for air, and Ian’s eyes are slowly opening as his face goes maraschino cherry red.

There’s something in his eyes that Caddy doesn’t completely know how to decipher.

* * *

**26 hours ago.**

“We know that’s bullshit,” Jimmy finally says as he sits up, eyes barely open against the harsh overhead lights of the room.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Ian slurs, almost letting go of Caddy’s hand but keeping them linked by their pinkies.

“Whatever,” Jimmy sighs, reaching a hand out. “Gimme the booze.”

Caddy - no, wait, his name is definitely Jam - hands it over. “What were _you_ doing without us?”

The couple on the bed flush, and Luke opens his mouth to speak before Jimmy covers it with his hand, already drinking from the bottle of vodka in his hands. “ _Nothing._ ”

He hands it off to Luke, and the cycle begins again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "because youre stupid and tall" caddy says, even though he's only like an inch shorter than ian
> 
> also drunk ian calls james caddy in his narration, and jam when he has to address him. that's today's game of "spot the reference."
> 
> (EDIT: number of hours adjusted from 72 to 48 to 36)


	3. The End

**20 hours ago.**

They quite literally stumble into a little white wedding chapel at 2 on sunday morning. Ian and Caddy are only there to watch as Luke and Jimmy get married, a spur of the moment idea they had three hours ago after getting drunker than ever.

This is not what happens.

The people who run the chapel mistakenly believe that Ian and Caddy - who are both leaning on each other, hands linked, inches away from making out drunkenly - are the “happy couple.”

Everyone is too drunk to protest, and they end up dropping a hundred dollars on the basic package.

* * *

**19 hours ago.**

“Do you, Ian, take James to be your lawfully wedded husband?”

“I do.”

“And do you, James, feel the same?”

“I do.”

They’re both in rented tuxes, but they clean up well even though they’re not nearly sober enough to actually be consenting to this.

(The chapel, while not the bad guys in this story, are very morally dubious, and cannot be accounted for in a court of law.)

They get matching rings, which are probably just painted plastic, and there’s lots of rice and flowers being thrown around as they run, hand in hand, out of the chapel, Jimmy and Luke following closely behind.

* * *

**16 hours ago.**

With _Shots_ by LMFAO playing overhead, it wasn’t hard for our group of friends to find motivation to just keep drinking. And, frankly, play way too many slots. And lose too much money.

Which is what they’re doing right now, with Ian losing a game of Wheel of Fortune slots.

They spend way too much time losing money. But hey, it’s Vegas, so it doesn’t count, right?

* * *

**13 hours ago.**

They make it back to the hotel room, ready to just sleep off the drunkenness.

But when they get there, someone decides that calling strippers at 9 am on a sunday morning is a good idea, so they keep drinking, and the strippers end up staying longer than they were hired to just because our boys are so nice.

They don’t charge them extra, either. The men dressed as firefighters honestly just have way too much fun dressing Ian and Caddy up in drag.

Especially when they find out that Ian and Caddy are newlyweds.

* * *

**7 hours ago.**

“James, what the fuck,” Ian whispers, deciding that straight-out asking instead of piecing things together like a stupid movie is going to get him answers faster.

He regrets asking almost immediately, though, because the hand holding his flexes and he realises that it’s James’ hand in his.

His mouth goes dry.

“Moose?” James asks, much louder than he probably expected. Ian winces, squeezes James’ hand as if the touch alone isn’t making his heart thump loudly. “What the fuck are we doing here?”

“Do you mean literally or metaphorically?”

“Shut the fuck up,” the body on top of Ian groans, and he realises belatedly that it’s Luke.

* * *

**5 hours ago.**

“Where’s Jimmy?” Luke asks, after sitting on the couch in the hotel room nursing his headache for two hours.

Ian and Caddy, from opposite sides of the room, shrug.

“I thought he was with you last?” Caddy admits, glancing at Ian.

“No?” Ian answers. “Luke, when was the last time you saw him?”

Luke wracks his brain, eventually coming up with nothing more than a shrug. “Call him.”

Ian scrambles for his phone as much as he can with a dull headache, eventually coming up with not just _his_ phone, but James’, and Jimmy’s, all in the front pocket of James’ jeans. “James has our phones, somehow? Where’s yours?”

Luke pats his pockets, thankful that he didn’t lose his pants sometime during the day. He finds his wallet, the room key, but nothing else. “Shit, it’s not on me.”

“Well, let’s see if we can find it somewhere else in this shithole room,” Caddy says.

* * *

**3 hours ago.**

Ian scrapes his hand down his face, startling when the touch of something _definitely_ not his hand goes with it. He pulls his hand back to inspect it, finally noticing the gold band on his finger.

His head was finally starting to throb less, but trying to understand why he has a ring on his finger just makes it hurt even more.

“What the fuck,” he says, pulling the ring off his finger slowly.

“What?” Comes Luke’s voice, realising that Ian has stopped walking. They’re still on the hunt for Jimmy, after not finding Luke’s phone and getting no answer when called.

Ian holds up the ring. “Who am I married to?”

Caddy raises his left hand. He figured it out a while ago. “Um, Moose?”

Ian glances over, finally noticing the matching ring on James’s finger. “ _What the fuck._ ”

James shrugs. “I didn’t mention it earlier cause we’re kind of _still missing_ Jimmy.”

Ian closes his eyes, rubbing his temples. He has to admit, James is right. Jimmy is more important right now. His existential crisis can wait. “We’re not done having this conversation.”

* * *

**2 hours ago.**

Eventually, they find Jimmy halfway passed out on the hotel roof.

Luke is, understandably, relieved. He wakes his boyfriend up gently, smiling at him and making sure he’s okay.

The Vegas lights don’t reveal it, but when the group get back to the hotel room, they find out that Jimmy’s sunburned all to hell, and Ian has to make an emergency Aloe Vera run.

But the entire time they’re on the roof, Ian’s heart is running a marathon and his thoughts are going a mile an hour, because he remembers drinking shitty vodka on this exact same roof with Caddy seconds before he drunkenly kissed him. It takes everything in him to keep his expression neutral.

* * *

**1 hour ago.**

Caddy pulls him aside when he gets back, into the hallway outside his and Luke’s hotel room, where most of the weekend’s shenanigans have taken place.

Ian’s heart is hammering in his chest.

James doesn’t look much better off.

“So, am I the only one who remembers the roof last night?” James asks, when he realises that Ian isn’t going to talk first.

“You’ll have to be more specific,” Ian says, and he hopes it comes off as aloof and unattainable. (It doesn’t.)

“We kissed, Ian,” James states simply.

Ian sucks in a breath. “Yeah, I remember that.”

“Specifically, _you_ kissed _me_.”

He closes his eyes. “Yeah.”

“Is that all you have to say?” ‘Yeah?’” James accuses.

Ian’s eyes snap open, something cold but vulnerable in them. “I don’t know what you _want me_ to say, James. That we were drunk, and it didn’t mean anything? Well, I can’t fucking do that.”

“Ian -”

“ _No!_ I can’t tell you that it didn’t mean anything because that kiss meant everything to me, James. My heart has been pounding since I fucking woke up holding your hand this morning, and it’s absolutely _killing_ me-”

“Ian.”

“-To be standing here admitting that I fucking love you _knowing_ that you don’t love me back. I love you, James, and that kiss was the first good thing--”

“Ian!”

Ian blinks as he’s cut off, coming back to himself, face flushing as he realises what he was just saying. “What?”

“You’re a jerk,” James tells him, before pulling him into a kiss by the collar of his shirt.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> its the week of Finishing Things™ apparently
> 
> anyways i hope you enjoyed, i sure as heck had a lot of fun writing this even though the timing was confusing as hell for me, lol.
> 
> (also, they do stay together but dont get their actual marriage license for a while.)

**Author's Note:**

> ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
> 
> find me on tumblr @ oswiniarty


End file.
